Happy Birthday to Me (and Meg)
Happy Birthday to Me (and Meg)
Happy Birthday, Handsome Me
Happy Birthday to Me (and Meg)

I'm now 10 years old
Meg is just turning 5
I feel like a youngster
And I still have my Grrrrr!

Pups, please email me now
Tell me about yourself
I'll send you a treat
Something yummy to eat!

Happy New Year!! I hope your holidays were as full of as much dog gone fun as mine were. Have you made your New Year's resolutions yet? Well, I have and I'm ready to turn a new leaf. I'm sure you've heard the phrases "learn from your mistakes" and "history repeats itself". This year I resolve to not let history repeat itself and to learn from the mistakes I made in 2004. In 2005 I resolve to:

1. NOT watch reruns of Lassie, especially if someone is home. I was "found out" a few months ago. It is very unbecoming (and embarrassing) to see a manly Labrador, such as myself, weeping and carrying on. Bring on the "CUJO" and "Rambo Rottweiler".
2. NOT play with the little black and white striped puppy, if it ever wonders my way again. Man, does he stink up the place if you make him mad. He doesn't have a collar and I'm sure he is in short supply of friends... with his body odor problem!
3. DO work on scaring the man that drives the big brown truck with U-P-S on the side. No matter how much I barked and jumped around, he kept coming back and leaving brown cardboard boxes. I vow to work harder on the "big, bad dog" look. How many boxes can one household use?
4. NOT snicker and roll around on the ground when my "Mom" asks if the outfit she's wearing makes her rear end look big. I contend that fibbing isn't a crime if it results in more treats!

I don't know about you, but I'm thrilled to be in the midst of another NFL season. As you all know, I take my football very seriously. In case you're confused about proper football etiquette, I've listed a few of the most important rules to follow:
1. On game day it is extremely important to wear the proper attire. Persons wearing less than two pieces of team clothing should be ejected from the game.
2. It is imperative that you have A LOT of snack food within easy reach. Celery, carrot sticks and other non-caloric rabbit food should not be permitted.
3. Items that represent your favorite team should be scattered about the room.
4. Anyone that does not cheer for your team cannot be invited to the next football party. If the offending person is a family member, put them in "time out" until they see things your way.

I am a Lab, a Lab I am
Who loves to sleep and play
I chase the cats and squirrels too
To pass the time each day.

I have a sis, her name is Meg
She is a little pest
I growled real loud and bared my teeth
And told her to head west.

She still lives here, I'm kinda glad
I didn't run her out
I need a pup to take the blame
When there is any doubt.

I like to camp and hike long trails
With my Mom and Dad
Mom and I can go all day
But Dad is real, real sad.

I take a visit to my favorite pond
for a fun filled dip and dunk
Then what better way to end a paddlin' day
With a feast of a dead skunk.

I'm not picky, I clean my plate
I love my daily treat
I watch my weight and exercise
For the girl I hope to meet.

Oops, I'd better go, I've got to run
I'd like to tell you more
I must find Meg and make her stay
By the mess that's on the floor.


P.S. I'm back outside, the coast is clear
Meg is at her post
I didn't mean to track mud in
But it's Meg who will be toast!